Sunday Tribune 17 May
A friend of mine once had a rare audience with punk legend Joey Ramone. Joey was, as always, sporting his trademark sunglasses. It was late at night after a gig at Dublin's TV Club and Tony asked him, jokingly, if he ever took them off.
"No, man," replied Joey.
"But can you actually see anything through them?"
Joey shrugged, implying the negative. Tony persevered.
"Does that not bother you?"
"Look, man," said Joey, his pupils hidden behind two almost-opaque walls of glass, "there's not a HELL of a lot I WANT to see out there."
It was an interesting world view – or, rather, lack of it. I was reminded of it last week when I read the profoundly touching story of Dublin woman, Jenny O'Connell, who has had her sight partially restored after 46 years. Jenny went blind when she was 11 and will soon, hopefully, be able to see her husband and children. She will see a lot of other new things too, which must be exciting, and daunting, for her.
As Jenny was entering into darkness in 1963, Ireland was emerging from it. Kennedy visited, the showbands jived and Sean Lemass was lowering unemployment. The queues Jenny may have seen for the Mail Boat were shrinking. She won't see any today because there is no escape route for the 380,000 unemployed. She will, however, be able to see what a modern dole queue looks like: multi-racial and full of highly-skilled people.
Among the many coloured faces Jenny will see here now are those of the Orange People – 1960s' freckles are extinct. This month, scores of Irish children are being sprayed-tanned orange for their Communions. These little tangerines may grow up to become the Jaffa-hued models who inhabit the diary pages like Rosanna 'Rubex' Davison and her boyfriend, Whasisname. Are they on? Are they off? Will they please get lost? Jenny can now fully appreciate the fake-tan-deep, appearance-obsessed vacuousness of post-Tiger Ireland.
She can also put a face on Brian Cowen and see those voluptuous, bee-stung lips mouthing phrases like "what's the point?". That was his despairing response to heckling over his handling of the Monageer tragedy report. Like the rest of us, Jenny will not be able to read all of the report as it's been censored. She can, however, see photographs of the little Dunne girls who were killed by their dad.
Along with Cowen's mouth, she can also marvel at some necks: those of Ireland's developers. They are setting up a federation to dictate how the National Asset Management Agency operates. Developers created most of the ugly landscapes Jenny is seeing for the first time. Now they are forming a union to fight the state. Imagine the first AGM: all of them in one room. Hopefully the roof will cave in.
In 1960s' Ireland, the bank manager was cock-of-the-walk. Jenny nearly got to see one of those cockerels being egged at AIB's EGM last week. Pensioner Gary Keogh said he snapped when supremo Dermot Gleeson told a shareholder to "sit down while I'm speaking". He flung eggs at the stage and was 'whisked' away by security. What was that old phrase about never teaching 'your granny how to suck eggs'?
Jenny will see her first Dart, Luas and euro. She will see her first Limerick gang funeral. She can watch all the bad news she likes on digital TV. She can sample other digital treats like generic text messages ('CU L8R'?) and the internet at its clinical, automated worst. From tomorrow, Ryanair passengers will have to check in online and print their boarding passes at home, or be hit with a €40 penalty. Jenny has children to do this for her. Ryanair apparently doesn't care about those who don't.
Joey Ramone said there wasn't a hell of a lot he wanted to see. If the above examples were all that were on offer, you'd have to agree. They aren't.
Along with the new sights, there are old ones for Jenny to rediscover. She's from Dun Laoghaire. In time, she will be able to walk with her blind husband along the seafront there on a sunny day, like last Tuesday. She can describe what she sees to him. The colour of the sea foaming over the walls of the Fortyfoot at Sandycove. A nutter in a rickety boat see-sawing through the swell to Bulloch Harbour. People sheltering from the breeze in the lee of the wall at the half-moon-shaped beach. Sunburn glowing above the collars of old folk sunbathing with their coats on. The Mr Whippy van arriving, children paddling, dogs chasing waves. Someone poking a jellyfish with a stick.
She can stop in Fitzgerald's pub and admire the murals or watch, for the first time, a glass of stout slowly change from marble to jet black. She can describe the bubbling, fleeting happiness of a sunny day in our odd little country. How we savour that small morsel of happiness and declare it a feast.
Maybe, someday soon, she'll read this article to her husband. I hope she does, because I'd like to thank her here for lifting people's spirits with her story.
Thank you, Mrs O'Connell. Life sucks right now, but you've proved that hope is lurking everywhere.
dkenny@tribune.ie
Monday, June 1, 2009
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Greens have sacrificed principles for the illusion of power
Sunday Tribune 10 May
What's that sound? Is it the thunder of hooves just over the next ridge? Hurray! It's George Lee leading the cavalry (he's the one on a Segway) to rescue us from the dole queue. Hip, hip, hurray etc, etc.
No matter how you look at it, Fine Gael has floored Fianna Fáil with its choice of candidate for the Dublin South by-election on 5 June. George ticks all the boxes: he's sincere, popular and knowledgable. With the exception of FF, the announcement was loudly applauded. Too loudly. The reaction bordered on mild hysteria. George, while being very, very good at maths, has no political track record. He might be rubbish. Still, it said a lot about where we, the electorate, are at emotionally.
Lee's decision may turn out to be a missed opportunity. Many would like to see a new party enter the fray. With George's financial acumen bolstered by a couple of seasoned dissidents, we could have seen the birth of the George Lee Party. ('George Lee' and 'party': there's three words you don't see together too often.) In time, it might have become known as the Glee Party – 'Spreading the message of gloom with Glee'. Now we'll never know.
While George was throwing shapes over the economy, another man of principle, Eddie Hobbs, reminded us of Fianna Fáil's culture of hard-necked cronyism. Hobbs resigned in protest from the National Consumer Association on Thursday. He had called for Bertie Ahern's 'ex', Celia Larkin, to step down over the revelation that she was fast-tracked for a mortgage by Michael Fingleton. True to FF form, she refused.
The two 'people's economists' aren't the only men of principle taking pot-shots at Fianna Fáil. The Greens are at it too. The first rumblings between the Saviours of the Earth and Fianna Fáil came over the TDs' bonuses debacle. Then John Gormley announced the scrapping of electronic voting, despite a Cabinet decision to defer it. Last Wednesday, Eamon Ryan really stuck the boot in. He told Newstalk's Eamon Keane that he wouldn't recommend Green voters give their transfers to Fianna Fáil in the upcoming local elections. He also said the Greens would be open to doing business with Fine Gael/Labour in a possible National Government. Principled Ryan spoke of "values". He didn't mention loyalty to his government partners, though.
FF played down Ryan's disloyalty and revealed its grand by-election plan to defeat George Lee. It has chosen the late Seamus Brennan's son, Shay, to run against him. Fine Gael is putting up a trusted economist, while FF is relying on sentiment. Economies are not saved by sentiment.
To compound the impression that Fianna Fáil is entirely clueless, Brian Lenihan said, disingenuously, that the three sets of elections on 5 June don't constitute "a referendum". This is rubbish. Fianna Fáil will be tested across the entire voting spectrum: local, by-elections and European. The outcome will reflect the public mood: 384,000 unemployed people are looking forward to letting him and his colleagues know how we feel. You only have to look at the election posters to see FF is really worried: the words 'Fianna Fáil' are microscopic. It's like they're trying to distance themselves from themselves.
Ryan's comments, too, were designed to distance the Greens from them in the run-up to the elections. The question is: What will the Greens do when the elections are over? If Ryan was disloyal last week, imagine what he'll be like when FF is really down.
There's revolution in the air. The public is subconsciously preparing for a new government. As Seán O'Rourke was grilling Lee on Tuesday's News at One, the speculation wasn't whether he would win the seat, but what portfolio he would get in the next cabinet. Lee had leaped that hurdle and was already in a new Fine Gael-led government in the public's mind.
The Greens realise this and that they face annihilation in a general election. They need to start building bridges, which may be why Ryan spoke about doing business with Fine Gael on Newstalk. This double talk, however, is giving weight to ex-Green Patricia McKenna's assertion that they are hypocrites who have sold out.
George Lee has sacrificed his power as a commentator to follow his principles. The Greens have sacrificed their principles for the illusion of power. Their weasly behaviour is at odds with the image of a party with lofty ideals. They used to stand for integrity and plain-speaking. It's taken them just two years to learn how to speak like Fianna Fáil. They are still politically immature though. Trying to be Machiavellian doesn't suit them and is, frankly, a bit embarassing. It's like watching the class nerd trying to act tough.
The response to Lee's candidacy has shown that, psychologically, we are already on a general election footing. By failing to strongly endorse their partners now, the Greens are effectively undermining them. They are hinting that they're having doubts. If they don't act upon these doubts, they are finished as a party. It's a dangerous game they're playing.
The Greens can still show they have some principles left. They should jump ship now, before it's too late, and nail their colours to a National Government mast.
It's either that, or get nailed by a seething electorate.
dkenny@tribune.ie
What's that sound? Is it the thunder of hooves just over the next ridge? Hurray! It's George Lee leading the cavalry (he's the one on a Segway) to rescue us from the dole queue. Hip, hip, hurray etc, etc.
No matter how you look at it, Fine Gael has floored Fianna Fáil with its choice of candidate for the Dublin South by-election on 5 June. George ticks all the boxes: he's sincere, popular and knowledgable. With the exception of FF, the announcement was loudly applauded. Too loudly. The reaction bordered on mild hysteria. George, while being very, very good at maths, has no political track record. He might be rubbish. Still, it said a lot about where we, the electorate, are at emotionally.
Lee's decision may turn out to be a missed opportunity. Many would like to see a new party enter the fray. With George's financial acumen bolstered by a couple of seasoned dissidents, we could have seen the birth of the George Lee Party. ('George Lee' and 'party': there's three words you don't see together too often.) In time, it might have become known as the Glee Party – 'Spreading the message of gloom with Glee'. Now we'll never know.
While George was throwing shapes over the economy, another man of principle, Eddie Hobbs, reminded us of Fianna Fáil's culture of hard-necked cronyism. Hobbs resigned in protest from the National Consumer Association on Thursday. He had called for Bertie Ahern's 'ex', Celia Larkin, to step down over the revelation that she was fast-tracked for a mortgage by Michael Fingleton. True to FF form, she refused.
The two 'people's economists' aren't the only men of principle taking pot-shots at Fianna Fáil. The Greens are at it too. The first rumblings between the Saviours of the Earth and Fianna Fáil came over the TDs' bonuses debacle. Then John Gormley announced the scrapping of electronic voting, despite a Cabinet decision to defer it. Last Wednesday, Eamon Ryan really stuck the boot in. He told Newstalk's Eamon Keane that he wouldn't recommend Green voters give their transfers to Fianna Fáil in the upcoming local elections. He also said the Greens would be open to doing business with Fine Gael/Labour in a possible National Government. Principled Ryan spoke of "values". He didn't mention loyalty to his government partners, though.
FF played down Ryan's disloyalty and revealed its grand by-election plan to defeat George Lee. It has chosen the late Seamus Brennan's son, Shay, to run against him. Fine Gael is putting up a trusted economist, while FF is relying on sentiment. Economies are not saved by sentiment.
To compound the impression that Fianna Fáil is entirely clueless, Brian Lenihan said, disingenuously, that the three sets of elections on 5 June don't constitute "a referendum". This is rubbish. Fianna Fáil will be tested across the entire voting spectrum: local, by-elections and European. The outcome will reflect the public mood: 384,000 unemployed people are looking forward to letting him and his colleagues know how we feel. You only have to look at the election posters to see FF is really worried: the words 'Fianna Fáil' are microscopic. It's like they're trying to distance themselves from themselves.
Ryan's comments, too, were designed to distance the Greens from them in the run-up to the elections. The question is: What will the Greens do when the elections are over? If Ryan was disloyal last week, imagine what he'll be like when FF is really down.
There's revolution in the air. The public is subconsciously preparing for a new government. As Seán O'Rourke was grilling Lee on Tuesday's News at One, the speculation wasn't whether he would win the seat, but what portfolio he would get in the next cabinet. Lee had leaped that hurdle and was already in a new Fine Gael-led government in the public's mind.
The Greens realise this and that they face annihilation in a general election. They need to start building bridges, which may be why Ryan spoke about doing business with Fine Gael on Newstalk. This double talk, however, is giving weight to ex-Green Patricia McKenna's assertion that they are hypocrites who have sold out.
George Lee has sacrificed his power as a commentator to follow his principles. The Greens have sacrificed their principles for the illusion of power. Their weasly behaviour is at odds with the image of a party with lofty ideals. They used to stand for integrity and plain-speaking. It's taken them just two years to learn how to speak like Fianna Fáil. They are still politically immature though. Trying to be Machiavellian doesn't suit them and is, frankly, a bit embarassing. It's like watching the class nerd trying to act tough.
The response to Lee's candidacy has shown that, psychologically, we are already on a general election footing. By failing to strongly endorse their partners now, the Greens are effectively undermining them. They are hinting that they're having doubts. If they don't act upon these doubts, they are finished as a party. It's a dangerous game they're playing.
The Greens can still show they have some principles left. They should jump ship now, before it's too late, and nail their colours to a National Government mast.
It's either that, or get nailed by a seething electorate.
dkenny@tribune.ie
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Nice u-turn Micheál, but you're hardly a class act
Sunday Tribune 3 May
Is it just me or has anybody else noticed it? George Lee's name is ironic. He's 'G. Lee'. Mr Glee, no less. I realised this as Mr Glee's sepulchral tones delivered the bad news from the ESRI on Wednesday – unemployment is now expected to reach the 500,000 mark. Ireland is suffering the worst recession anywhere since the 1930s.
Mr Glee's glum report was the icing on a fruitcake week, which was dominated by cats, pigs and a u-turn by a senior minister. Let's deal with the cats first.
Top Cat economist, David Grubb of the OECD, says our dole is too generous. It discourages people from looking for work. Really? 380,000 people may beg to differ. Last week, a clothes shop in Galway received 1,000 applications for just 60 jobs. Among the applicants were teachers, lawyers and other graduates, all willing to set aside years of training – and the dole – to sell clothes. Being employed is about more than just money, it's about self-esteem. People want to work, not get 'hooked' on the dole, despite what the experts say. That's why so many workers were angry at being the victims of another 'cat' last week: the unofficial wildcat bus strike.
On Monday, a group of morons at Dublin Bus hindered 100,000 commuters because a driver was suspended for refusing to work an agreed new schedule. What kind of idiots strike in a recession? Half-witted actions like this only further destabilise the economy. The government should introduce legislation outlawing the disruption of public transport without union sanction. If that's not possible, then future job contracts should have a clause waiving the 'right' to unofficial action. Selfish bus drivers should not be allowed to mess up the economy. That's the job of the lads in Leinster House, which brings us to the pigs we mentioned earlier.
Last week, swine flu arrived to hoots of derision from Ryanair's Dr Michael O'Leary. He prescribed Strepsils and accused "idiot politicians" of using this "load of b***** nonsense" to distract us from the economy. He's wrong: it's doubtful they could even do that properly. Day after day, our politicians prove how inept, self-centred and deluded they are. Take Bertie Ahern, for example. He's more delusional than a pig looking forward to Christmas.
Last week, he hinted he wants to be Dublin's first publicly elected Mayor. The job should go to an experienced politician, he said. Not someone going around "making an ass of themselves". (Hasn't he already got that gig?)
Bertie believes he can have whatever job he wants when he leaves the Dáil. After receiving a fat pay-off and pension, he wants to continue swanning around in a state-paid job. When it comes to having a jaw-dropping sense of entitlement, Bertie is king. Or he was – last week, he was usurped by one of his former lieutenants.
On Monday, the Indo revealed that Micheál Martin will draw three pensions when he retires, worth nearly €130,000. These are ministerial, TD and teacher pensions. Martin has held on to his teaching job – for the past 20 years – despite financial security most of us only dream of. Under 'Oireachtas Leave' rules, he is entitled to do this while a substitute fills in for him. On Tuesday, he said he has no intention of quitting a job he hasn't worked at since 1989. This means he is denying someone a full-time post so he has something to fall back on if he loses his seat.
To add insult to injury, he lamely explained that he has a young family to support. Showing a rare lack of confidence, he pointed out that he's 48 and "if anything happened tomorrow morning with regard to my career…".
You have to feel sorry for him. If he gets the sack, he'll be staring at a bleak future on €130,000 a year and a six-figure lump sum. Despite being considered a potential taoiseach, he apparently doesn't believe he has the skill to carve out a business career. He's heading straight back to the classroom.
Yesterday, it emerged that he has had a change of heart since the Indo revelation and now only wants a pension for the five-and-a-half years he spent with his back to a blackboard. Big deal, he's still not giving up his teaching job.
Eleven of his Oireachtas colleagues – including Mary Hanafin – are also clinging to their teaching posts. Like Martin, they're frightened they might wind up hooked on the dole, as Mr Grubb says.
Martin was a member of the Ahern-led government that failed to put money aside for our future. He says he is only thinking of his family's by keeping his teaching options open. What a hypocrite. The 380,000 unemployed didn't have a back-up job when they were let go. What a great role model he'll make if he takes up teaching again.
Martin has been shamed into making a small gesture about his pension and doesn't deserve applause for it. His u-turn just means that there's a little less in the political trough for him as his colleagues snuffle around him.
Pigs will fly before any of them ever sees a dole queue.
dkenny@tribune.ie
Is it just me or has anybody else noticed it? George Lee's name is ironic. He's 'G. Lee'. Mr Glee, no less. I realised this as Mr Glee's sepulchral tones delivered the bad news from the ESRI on Wednesday – unemployment is now expected to reach the 500,000 mark. Ireland is suffering the worst recession anywhere since the 1930s.
Mr Glee's glum report was the icing on a fruitcake week, which was dominated by cats, pigs and a u-turn by a senior minister. Let's deal with the cats first.
Top Cat economist, David Grubb of the OECD, says our dole is too generous. It discourages people from looking for work. Really? 380,000 people may beg to differ. Last week, a clothes shop in Galway received 1,000 applications for just 60 jobs. Among the applicants were teachers, lawyers and other graduates, all willing to set aside years of training – and the dole – to sell clothes. Being employed is about more than just money, it's about self-esteem. People want to work, not get 'hooked' on the dole, despite what the experts say. That's why so many workers were angry at being the victims of another 'cat' last week: the unofficial wildcat bus strike.
On Monday, a group of morons at Dublin Bus hindered 100,000 commuters because a driver was suspended for refusing to work an agreed new schedule. What kind of idiots strike in a recession? Half-witted actions like this only further destabilise the economy. The government should introduce legislation outlawing the disruption of public transport without union sanction. If that's not possible, then future job contracts should have a clause waiving the 'right' to unofficial action. Selfish bus drivers should not be allowed to mess up the economy. That's the job of the lads in Leinster House, which brings us to the pigs we mentioned earlier.
Last week, swine flu arrived to hoots of derision from Ryanair's Dr Michael O'Leary. He prescribed Strepsils and accused "idiot politicians" of using this "load of b***** nonsense" to distract us from the economy. He's wrong: it's doubtful they could even do that properly. Day after day, our politicians prove how inept, self-centred and deluded they are. Take Bertie Ahern, for example. He's more delusional than a pig looking forward to Christmas.
Last week, he hinted he wants to be Dublin's first publicly elected Mayor. The job should go to an experienced politician, he said. Not someone going around "making an ass of themselves". (Hasn't he already got that gig?)
Bertie believes he can have whatever job he wants when he leaves the Dáil. After receiving a fat pay-off and pension, he wants to continue swanning around in a state-paid job. When it comes to having a jaw-dropping sense of entitlement, Bertie is king. Or he was – last week, he was usurped by one of his former lieutenants.
On Monday, the Indo revealed that Micheál Martin will draw three pensions when he retires, worth nearly €130,000. These are ministerial, TD and teacher pensions. Martin has held on to his teaching job – for the past 20 years – despite financial security most of us only dream of. Under 'Oireachtas Leave' rules, he is entitled to do this while a substitute fills in for him. On Tuesday, he said he has no intention of quitting a job he hasn't worked at since 1989. This means he is denying someone a full-time post so he has something to fall back on if he loses his seat.
To add insult to injury, he lamely explained that he has a young family to support. Showing a rare lack of confidence, he pointed out that he's 48 and "if anything happened tomorrow morning with regard to my career…".
You have to feel sorry for him. If he gets the sack, he'll be staring at a bleak future on €130,000 a year and a six-figure lump sum. Despite being considered a potential taoiseach, he apparently doesn't believe he has the skill to carve out a business career. He's heading straight back to the classroom.
Yesterday, it emerged that he has had a change of heart since the Indo revelation and now only wants a pension for the five-and-a-half years he spent with his back to a blackboard. Big deal, he's still not giving up his teaching job.
Eleven of his Oireachtas colleagues – including Mary Hanafin – are also clinging to their teaching posts. Like Martin, they're frightened they might wind up hooked on the dole, as Mr Grubb says.
Martin was a member of the Ahern-led government that failed to put money aside for our future. He says he is only thinking of his family's by keeping his teaching options open. What a hypocrite. The 380,000 unemployed didn't have a back-up job when they were let go. What a great role model he'll make if he takes up teaching again.
Martin has been shamed into making a small gesture about his pension and doesn't deserve applause for it. His u-turn just means that there's a little less in the political trough for him as his colleagues snuffle around him.
Pigs will fly before any of them ever sees a dole queue.
dkenny@tribune.ie
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Ahern's get-out-of-jail card will not solve prison crisis
Sunday Tribune 26 April
Gary Douche should not have died in Mountjoy. Those are the words of the man who beat him to death there in 2006. Nobody should die in Mountjoy, but they do, as in other prisons across our state.
Douche was in a holding cell to protect him from other prisoners. His killer, Stephen Egan, was there because the jail was overcrowded. He had been transferred from the Central Mental Hospital without his anti-psychotic drugs. I'll spare you the details of what happened.
We only ever hear what passes as life in Irish jails when someone like Gary Douche is killed. Attacks happen every day. As of 9 March, we had 3,790 prisoners and only 3,611 beds in our powder-keg prisons. They are operating at 105% of their capacity. While Douche lay dying in Mountjoy, there were 526 other inmates sleeping in the jail which had a capacity for just 470. There are now 633.
Four thousand prisoners doesn't seem like an overwhelming number to deal with. So why do we have overcrowding? It costs the state an average of €97,700 a year to house a prisoner. Do the maths: we have overcrowding because we're strapped for cash.
Justice minister Dermot Ahern made two announcements last week. The first was the publication of the Fines Bill 2009. At any given time, there are about 15 people in prison for non-payment of fines. The Bill allows defaulters pay by instalment as an alternative to jail.
The second heralded a plan to rehabilitate sex offenders. Prisoners who volunteer for therapy will be released early and electronically tagged. This will incentivise serious offenders to undergo treatment.
Both plans have merits and while I agree with the first, I don't with the second. Sex offenders are notorious recidivists and should do their time. Out of 578 released since 2003, only 42 had completed the Sex Offender Programme.
The optics are fine: TV licence fee defaulters stay out of jail and offenders get treatment. Look closer and you'll notice something both plans have in common: they free up prison space. Does the government believe releasing paedophiles is the answer to overcrowding? Or releasing short-term prisoners? Last year, anyone serving less than 20 months in Mountjoy's women's unit was released to make room for more serious offenders.
Or how about letting potential killers out on bail?
On 8 April, Ahern said that our bail laws can't be tightened because of prison overcrowding. There's no room for suspects who might not be granted bail. That's an admission of defeat.
Ahern knows that 25% of all serious crime is committed by people on bail (CSO, 2008). This includes rape and murder. Between 2004 and mid-2008, 90,000 serious crimes were committed by bailed suspects.
In 2007, despite garda objections, Tipperary man Jerry McGrath was granted bail after being arrested for assaulting a five-year-old girl. A month later, McGrath murdered mother-of-two Sylvia Roche Kelly. Her husband has accused the state of giving McGrath freedom which he used to carry out the killing.
Ahern has linked reform of the bail laws to overcrowding. His solution is early release. This will, inevitably, breed more crime. Our penal system is a revolving door which will soon be spinning faster than a government press secretary.
Every time the overcrowding issue comes up, the standard answer is 'Thornton Hall'. This 2,200-bed super-prison will solve everything. The problem is, Thornton Hall isn't being built. It's been "in the pipeline" for the past three years due to negotiation problems with the builders. There's a first: disharmony between the government and the construction industry.
The Prison Service can move quickly when it needs to, though. It's currently being investigated for awarding €100m of contracts to one building company – Glenbeigh Construction – without putting them out to public tender. The justice department secretary general, Sean Aylward, has defended the service saying it had to move quickly due to… overcrowding. Where there's a will there's a way.
Last week the government scrapped the unused electronic voting system that has cost us over €51m. Then there's the pay-offs to junior ministers and bonuses to 'veteran' TDs. All the money it has wasted could have been put towards Thornton Hall or some interim solution, like reopening Spike Island or the Curragh detention centre.
The former military camps at Rockhill House, Lifford, Monaghan and Longford could be used as 'boot camps' for young offenders, like Thorn Cross centre in Warrington. This is a voluntary scheme where prisoners sign up to learn respect and self-esteem. They are given construction courses leading to placements with local builders. If we had an Irish version, an offender could end up building Thornton Hall rather than residing in it.
The crime rate is rising and the government must protect us, inside and – more importantly – outside prison. Opening the gates is not the solution, minister. Stop wringing your hands about the bail laws and dreaming of Thornton Hall. Use the idle facilities we already have. Continuing to pack prisoners in will result in more Gary Douches. Continuing to let them out will result in more Sylvia Roche Kellys.
We don't want any more like them on our conscience. Find the space now.
dkenny@tribune.ie
Gary Douche should not have died in Mountjoy. Those are the words of the man who beat him to death there in 2006. Nobody should die in Mountjoy, but they do, as in other prisons across our state.
Douche was in a holding cell to protect him from other prisoners. His killer, Stephen Egan, was there because the jail was overcrowded. He had been transferred from the Central Mental Hospital without his anti-psychotic drugs. I'll spare you the details of what happened.
We only ever hear what passes as life in Irish jails when someone like Gary Douche is killed. Attacks happen every day. As of 9 March, we had 3,790 prisoners and only 3,611 beds in our powder-keg prisons. They are operating at 105% of their capacity. While Douche lay dying in Mountjoy, there were 526 other inmates sleeping in the jail which had a capacity for just 470. There are now 633.
Four thousand prisoners doesn't seem like an overwhelming number to deal with. So why do we have overcrowding? It costs the state an average of €97,700 a year to house a prisoner. Do the maths: we have overcrowding because we're strapped for cash.
Justice minister Dermot Ahern made two announcements last week. The first was the publication of the Fines Bill 2009. At any given time, there are about 15 people in prison for non-payment of fines. The Bill allows defaulters pay by instalment as an alternative to jail.
The second heralded a plan to rehabilitate sex offenders. Prisoners who volunteer for therapy will be released early and electronically tagged. This will incentivise serious offenders to undergo treatment.
Both plans have merits and while I agree with the first, I don't with the second. Sex offenders are notorious recidivists and should do their time. Out of 578 released since 2003, only 42 had completed the Sex Offender Programme.
The optics are fine: TV licence fee defaulters stay out of jail and offenders get treatment. Look closer and you'll notice something both plans have in common: they free up prison space. Does the government believe releasing paedophiles is the answer to overcrowding? Or releasing short-term prisoners? Last year, anyone serving less than 20 months in Mountjoy's women's unit was released to make room for more serious offenders.
Or how about letting potential killers out on bail?
On 8 April, Ahern said that our bail laws can't be tightened because of prison overcrowding. There's no room for suspects who might not be granted bail. That's an admission of defeat.
Ahern knows that 25% of all serious crime is committed by people on bail (CSO, 2008). This includes rape and murder. Between 2004 and mid-2008, 90,000 serious crimes were committed by bailed suspects.
In 2007, despite garda objections, Tipperary man Jerry McGrath was granted bail after being arrested for assaulting a five-year-old girl. A month later, McGrath murdered mother-of-two Sylvia Roche Kelly. Her husband has accused the state of giving McGrath freedom which he used to carry out the killing.
Ahern has linked reform of the bail laws to overcrowding. His solution is early release. This will, inevitably, breed more crime. Our penal system is a revolving door which will soon be spinning faster than a government press secretary.
Every time the overcrowding issue comes up, the standard answer is 'Thornton Hall'. This 2,200-bed super-prison will solve everything. The problem is, Thornton Hall isn't being built. It's been "in the pipeline" for the past three years due to negotiation problems with the builders. There's a first: disharmony between the government and the construction industry.
The Prison Service can move quickly when it needs to, though. It's currently being investigated for awarding €100m of contracts to one building company – Glenbeigh Construction – without putting them out to public tender. The justice department secretary general, Sean Aylward, has defended the service saying it had to move quickly due to… overcrowding. Where there's a will there's a way.
Last week the government scrapped the unused electronic voting system that has cost us over €51m. Then there's the pay-offs to junior ministers and bonuses to 'veteran' TDs. All the money it has wasted could have been put towards Thornton Hall or some interim solution, like reopening Spike Island or the Curragh detention centre.
The former military camps at Rockhill House, Lifford, Monaghan and Longford could be used as 'boot camps' for young offenders, like Thorn Cross centre in Warrington. This is a voluntary scheme where prisoners sign up to learn respect and self-esteem. They are given construction courses leading to placements with local builders. If we had an Irish version, an offender could end up building Thornton Hall rather than residing in it.
The crime rate is rising and the government must protect us, inside and – more importantly – outside prison. Opening the gates is not the solution, minister. Stop wringing your hands about the bail laws and dreaming of Thornton Hall. Use the idle facilities we already have. Continuing to pack prisoners in will result in more Gary Douches. Continuing to let them out will result in more Sylvia Roche Kellys.
We don't want any more like them on our conscience. Find the space now.
dkenny@tribune.ie
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Stagg's debate about legalising cannabis is stone mad
Sunday Tribune 19 April
It might have been the greatest economic plan ever conceived. Then again, it might not. Last week, I suggested raffling the country's toxic assets to raise money. I suggested we call this lottery The Blotto. As stupid ideas go, I thought it couldn't be beaten. It has.
Labour's Emmet Stagg has now suggested that the government legalise cannabis and tax it. The country should go from stoney broke to stoned and broke. Hurray.
Last Tuesday, he debated the idea with campaigner Grainne Kenny of Europe Against Drugs. 'Debate' is not the right word – it was more of a 'scrap'. Grainne lit into him, firing off facts about health, etc, while Emmet countered by calling her a fanatic.
He said he didn't know of anyone who died from cannabis use and that "drinking too much milk" is bad for you. Grainne boiled over, accusing him of not having done any research.
He called her a dictator. Grainne dug into him again. At the end, it was clear that, in Stagg's mind, he had beaten the 'mad oul wan' (my words, not his).
The mad oul wan is my mother, by the way. She told me she was annoyed with herself for losing her temper. As a hack, I've never commented on the drugs debate or defended Grainne before – she's capable of defending herself.
I will say, though, that her passion comes from the experience of quietly helping families with drugs problems. She sees hardships that most politicians only read about.
To tell you the truth, the drugs debate is not something I lie awake thinking about. I have other things to worry about – like paying bills. Stagg's comments have forced me to go on the record here and give an opinion. It's just that, an opinion, and it may be wrong. I don't agree with legalisation. This is not because the mammy says drugs are bad for me, but because I believe it's illogical.
I drink alcohol and smoke cigarettes and I accept the evidence that both are bad for me. I would expect anybody who smokes dope or promotes its legalisation to say the same.
Cannabis abusers, for example, run the risk of becoming psychotic. Here's a statistic: the number of teens presenting with mental health problems rose 22% (between April 2003/2004) after the UK downgraded cannabis. It has since 'upgraded' it again. As Stagg points out, this country already has problems with alcohol and tobacco.
Department of Health figures released last week show that one in five of us have been assaulted by a drunk. Over a quarter of us binge drink once a week. Cigarette smoking kills 7,000 people a year according to the Irish Cancer Society. Cannabis also intoxicates and can cause lung cancer. Where is the logic in legalising it, and increasing its usage, when we already have a problem with legal drugs?
Why would a government that is effectively outlawing cigarettes legalise cannabis? To beat the drug dealers? That's illogical too. The dealers will just sell other drugs. Do we then legalise cocaine? Or ecstasy? Or heroin?
At what age can you start smoking cannabis? Stoners don't generally make good students, so do we limit its use to those who have finished secondary school? Age restriction doesn't work with alcohol, so it won't work with cannabis. Do we bother with age restriction at all?
How much cannabis can you smoke before you are legally intoxicated? How many units/joints will put you over the limit? Will we have a 'joint' Oireachtas committee to look into all of this?
Of course, not all cannabis smokers will become psychotic or get cancer. They won't all graduate to heroin. The fact remains, however, that some will. Cannabis is not a harmless drug and anyone who says it is is either lying or hasn't done their research.
We need a debate on this issue by people who know what they're talking about. Stagg's contribution, last Tuesday, was devoid of any revelations other than "too much milk's bad for you". Children of Ireland, put down the Avonmore and toke on this. I suppose it will be our patriotic duty to get stoned, seeing as how we're doing it for the economy.
Stagg sounds like a man who has heard the words 'election' and 'coalition' blowing in the wind. He wants to raise his profile with young voters and win a portfolio before he retires. If not, and he really believes his drug tax will help the economy, then we can forget about ever electing a credible alternative to this government.
Every day we learn more about the ineptitude that has left us facing a future full of social problems, like rising drug abuse. The country needs hope. We need to know that someone out there has a solution. We don't need Stagg's nonsensical economics undermining that hope.
Eamon Gilmore must now clarify where his party stands on the only issue that concerns me and thousands of prospective voters today – the economy. Is Labour in favour of taxing drugs to fix it? Is that the best your party has to offer us? Is that it?
God help us if it is.
dkenny@tribune.ie
It might have been the greatest economic plan ever conceived. Then again, it might not. Last week, I suggested raffling the country's toxic assets to raise money. I suggested we call this lottery The Blotto. As stupid ideas go, I thought it couldn't be beaten. It has.
Labour's Emmet Stagg has now suggested that the government legalise cannabis and tax it. The country should go from stoney broke to stoned and broke. Hurray.
Last Tuesday, he debated the idea with campaigner Grainne Kenny of Europe Against Drugs. 'Debate' is not the right word – it was more of a 'scrap'. Grainne lit into him, firing off facts about health, etc, while Emmet countered by calling her a fanatic.
He said he didn't know of anyone who died from cannabis use and that "drinking too much milk" is bad for you. Grainne boiled over, accusing him of not having done any research.
He called her a dictator. Grainne dug into him again. At the end, it was clear that, in Stagg's mind, he had beaten the 'mad oul wan' (my words, not his).
The mad oul wan is my mother, by the way. She told me she was annoyed with herself for losing her temper. As a hack, I've never commented on the drugs debate or defended Grainne before – she's capable of defending herself.
I will say, though, that her passion comes from the experience of quietly helping families with drugs problems. She sees hardships that most politicians only read about.
To tell you the truth, the drugs debate is not something I lie awake thinking about. I have other things to worry about – like paying bills. Stagg's comments have forced me to go on the record here and give an opinion. It's just that, an opinion, and it may be wrong. I don't agree with legalisation. This is not because the mammy says drugs are bad for me, but because I believe it's illogical.
I drink alcohol and smoke cigarettes and I accept the evidence that both are bad for me. I would expect anybody who smokes dope or promotes its legalisation to say the same.
Cannabis abusers, for example, run the risk of becoming psychotic. Here's a statistic: the number of teens presenting with mental health problems rose 22% (between April 2003/2004) after the UK downgraded cannabis. It has since 'upgraded' it again. As Stagg points out, this country already has problems with alcohol and tobacco.
Department of Health figures released last week show that one in five of us have been assaulted by a drunk. Over a quarter of us binge drink once a week. Cigarette smoking kills 7,000 people a year according to the Irish Cancer Society. Cannabis also intoxicates and can cause lung cancer. Where is the logic in legalising it, and increasing its usage, when we already have a problem with legal drugs?
Why would a government that is effectively outlawing cigarettes legalise cannabis? To beat the drug dealers? That's illogical too. The dealers will just sell other drugs. Do we then legalise cocaine? Or ecstasy? Or heroin?
At what age can you start smoking cannabis? Stoners don't generally make good students, so do we limit its use to those who have finished secondary school? Age restriction doesn't work with alcohol, so it won't work with cannabis. Do we bother with age restriction at all?
How much cannabis can you smoke before you are legally intoxicated? How many units/joints will put you over the limit? Will we have a 'joint' Oireachtas committee to look into all of this?
Of course, not all cannabis smokers will become psychotic or get cancer. They won't all graduate to heroin. The fact remains, however, that some will. Cannabis is not a harmless drug and anyone who says it is is either lying or hasn't done their research.
We need a debate on this issue by people who know what they're talking about. Stagg's contribution, last Tuesday, was devoid of any revelations other than "too much milk's bad for you". Children of Ireland, put down the Avonmore and toke on this. I suppose it will be our patriotic duty to get stoned, seeing as how we're doing it for the economy.
Stagg sounds like a man who has heard the words 'election' and 'coalition' blowing in the wind. He wants to raise his profile with young voters and win a portfolio before he retires. If not, and he really believes his drug tax will help the economy, then we can forget about ever electing a credible alternative to this government.
Every day we learn more about the ineptitude that has left us facing a future full of social problems, like rising drug abuse. The country needs hope. We need to know that someone out there has a solution. We don't need Stagg's nonsensical economics undermining that hope.
Eamon Gilmore must now clarify where his party stands on the only issue that concerns me and thousands of prospective voters today – the economy. Is Labour in favour of taxing drugs to fix it? Is that the best your party has to offer us? Is that it?
God help us if it is.
dkenny@tribune.ie
Sunday, April 19, 2009
One way to solve the economic crisis – get Blottoed
Sunday Tribune, 12 April
It is Easter Sunday and I bring you tidings of great joy. That's right, 'great joy', for tomorrow night there will arise from our midst two new millionaires. Hallelujah. On Tuesday morning, when everyone else is glumly listening to Mourning Ireland, two lucky people will be chuckling away under their respective duvets thanks to the National Lottery's Millionaire draw.
Have you bought a ticket? Don't worry if you haven't as I've even better news for you: I have a plan to make us all a few bob and rescue the country from the knacker's yard. It's this: we hold a big raffle. A VERY BIG raffle. The WORLD'S BIGGEST RAFFLE EVER, in fact.
Last Tuesday, Brian Lenihan announced that he's buying a load of useless land and half-finished buildings on our behalf. He calls them "toxic assets". Every day, their value is getting smaller, but someday, someone, somewhere may buy them. That's what he's hoping for, at any rate. My plan is, instead of leaving these "toxic assets" lying idle, we (drum roll, please)… raffle them. As this brilliant idea came to me after a few budget-free scoops, I propose to call this land Lotto, the 'Blotto'.
Here's how it works: Brian is blindfolded (nothing new there) and chooses one toxic deed from the pile in his office. Let's say it's for an unfinished street. This is then put up for the Blotto. Tickets are sold worldwide, priced at €50 each. As there are 80 million people who claim Irish ancestry, that's a guaranteed €4bn already. Then there's the Chinese – they love a gamble and there's a billion of them. There's loads of Africans too. See the potential? Some lucky Blotto player will win a (half-finished) street for €50. They can then sell it back to the developer at a reasonable price and he can finish it off using cheap Irish labour. The state, the winner and the developer all make a profit. The houses are then sold at pre-boom prices. 'Blotto! It could be you!!'
There's even a precedent for Blotto. In 1984, horse trainer Barney Curley raffled his Middleton Park mansion, selling 9,000 tickets at £200 each. Last October, Tony Browne from Corbally, Co Limerick, decided to do the same with his €352,000 home (he reckoned 800 tickets at €500 each would do the trick).
The authorities have played Blotto before as well. In November 2002, Cork City Council raffled 40 homes to 600 people. The pathetic state of the affordable housing scheme was highlighted when the council put the applicants' names in a hat and offered to sell a cut-price house to the first 40 out.
But why stop with toxic assets? We could Blotto places we don't like and are costing us money. Like the gang-ridden 'Island' area of Limerick where the cost of policing is outrageous. We could market it as "a disarming corner of the Shannon estuary with abundant wild life".
Once a month, we could buy special 'Madonna Blotto' tickets, with the winner getting adopted by that nice old lady. Well, what's Malawi got that Ireland hasn't? Apart from more money, of course.
Why not Blotto the entire country? Maybe not – the Germans might win us. Any road, that's my rescue plan. Now consider the government's plan.
The plan is to bleed us dry with new levies and rescue their wealthy friends by buying up their "toxic" land for €90bn. Some of this land may never be eligible for planning permission. What then? Does the government plan to force permission through?
The government believes it's "fair" to spend €90bn cleaning up their friends' mess and then levy people on the minimum wage. That's €18,000 a year. To put that figure in context, during the first 10 months of 2008, €23,000 was spent on serviettes and crockery at Leinster House's catering facilities.
While we are being screwed, the drinks and racing industries are left unscathed. You can't get a job or pay your mortgage, but you can drink yourself to death or gamble your house on the horses. That's an interesting message to send the electorate.
Where were the incentives in this
budget? Why wasn't VAT lowered? If even 1% was chipped off, it might have encouraged those who have money to spend it. As for jobs, if the government manages to dispose of "toxic" land, the only employment generated will be in the construction industry – the same industry that got us into this mess.
Social problems are rising and last week the gardaí said that cutbacks are hampering their ability to respond to calls for help. The government that failed to protect us from the bankers is now failing to protect us from criminals.
Brian Lenihan's bludget is brutal in every sense of the word and, like the regime that spawned it, is utterly devoid of any original ideas. It's the final proof that we need a National Government – fast. It makes the Blotto Plan look positively inspired.
Here's an idea: let's Blotto Lenihan and see how many tickets we sell. I bet we'd shift more if we Blottoed one of those paintings of bare-chested Brian Cowen.
Either way, you're looking at the ultimate booby prize.
It is Easter Sunday and I bring you tidings of great joy. That's right, 'great joy', for tomorrow night there will arise from our midst two new millionaires. Hallelujah. On Tuesday morning, when everyone else is glumly listening to Mourning Ireland, two lucky people will be chuckling away under their respective duvets thanks to the National Lottery's Millionaire draw.
Have you bought a ticket? Don't worry if you haven't as I've even better news for you: I have a plan to make us all a few bob and rescue the country from the knacker's yard. It's this: we hold a big raffle. A VERY BIG raffle. The WORLD'S BIGGEST RAFFLE EVER, in fact.
Last Tuesday, Brian Lenihan announced that he's buying a load of useless land and half-finished buildings on our behalf. He calls them "toxic assets". Every day, their value is getting smaller, but someday, someone, somewhere may buy them. That's what he's hoping for, at any rate. My plan is, instead of leaving these "toxic assets" lying idle, we (drum roll, please)… raffle them. As this brilliant idea came to me after a few budget-free scoops, I propose to call this land Lotto, the 'Blotto'.
Here's how it works: Brian is blindfolded (nothing new there) and chooses one toxic deed from the pile in his office. Let's say it's for an unfinished street. This is then put up for the Blotto. Tickets are sold worldwide, priced at €50 each. As there are 80 million people who claim Irish ancestry, that's a guaranteed €4bn already. Then there's the Chinese – they love a gamble and there's a billion of them. There's loads of Africans too. See the potential? Some lucky Blotto player will win a (half-finished) street for €50. They can then sell it back to the developer at a reasonable price and he can finish it off using cheap Irish labour. The state, the winner and the developer all make a profit. The houses are then sold at pre-boom prices. 'Blotto! It could be you!!'
There's even a precedent for Blotto. In 1984, horse trainer Barney Curley raffled his Middleton Park mansion, selling 9,000 tickets at £200 each. Last October, Tony Browne from Corbally, Co Limerick, decided to do the same with his €352,000 home (he reckoned 800 tickets at €500 each would do the trick).
The authorities have played Blotto before as well. In November 2002, Cork City Council raffled 40 homes to 600 people. The pathetic state of the affordable housing scheme was highlighted when the council put the applicants' names in a hat and offered to sell a cut-price house to the first 40 out.
But why stop with toxic assets? We could Blotto places we don't like and are costing us money. Like the gang-ridden 'Island' area of Limerick where the cost of policing is outrageous. We could market it as "a disarming corner of the Shannon estuary with abundant wild life".
Once a month, we could buy special 'Madonna Blotto' tickets, with the winner getting adopted by that nice old lady. Well, what's Malawi got that Ireland hasn't? Apart from more money, of course.
Why not Blotto the entire country? Maybe not – the Germans might win us. Any road, that's my rescue plan. Now consider the government's plan.
The plan is to bleed us dry with new levies and rescue their wealthy friends by buying up their "toxic" land for €90bn. Some of this land may never be eligible for planning permission. What then? Does the government plan to force permission through?
The government believes it's "fair" to spend €90bn cleaning up their friends' mess and then levy people on the minimum wage. That's €18,000 a year. To put that figure in context, during the first 10 months of 2008, €23,000 was spent on serviettes and crockery at Leinster House's catering facilities.
While we are being screwed, the drinks and racing industries are left unscathed. You can't get a job or pay your mortgage, but you can drink yourself to death or gamble your house on the horses. That's an interesting message to send the electorate.
Where were the incentives in this
budget? Why wasn't VAT lowered? If even 1% was chipped off, it might have encouraged those who have money to spend it. As for jobs, if the government manages to dispose of "toxic" land, the only employment generated will be in the construction industry – the same industry that got us into this mess.
Social problems are rising and last week the gardaí said that cutbacks are hampering their ability to respond to calls for help. The government that failed to protect us from the bankers is now failing to protect us from criminals.
Brian Lenihan's bludget is brutal in every sense of the word and, like the regime that spawned it, is utterly devoid of any original ideas. It's the final proof that we need a National Government – fast. It makes the Blotto Plan look positively inspired.
Here's an idea: let's Blotto Lenihan and see how many tickets we sell. I bet we'd shift more if we Blottoed one of those paintings of bare-chested Brian Cowen.
Either way, you're looking at the ultimate booby prize.
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
A gag that's not funny... and is a threat to democracy
Sunday Tribune, April 5
Picture this: Bertie Ahern picks up the Sunday Tribune, sees a portrait of himself in the nude on page one and immediately despatches his art dealer with a brown envelope to buy it. Bertie doesn't want an unflattering picture of himself in the public domain. The only aras he wants the public to connect him with is the one in the Park.
Plausible? Highly. True? Unfortunately not. The preceding scenario formed a newspaper's April Fool's gag last week and I'm not ashamed to admit that I fell for it. That's the thing about Bertie – you wouldn't put anything past him. For a man who loves the limelight, he's fiercely protective of his privacy. He doesn't like the papers showing him up. That is probably why, under his stewardship, the VAT on newspapers rose to 13.5% – the highest in Europe (Britain has zero VAT). It probably also explains why his administration published a Privacy Bill in 2006 to curb the power of the press. Naughty press, Fianna Fáil will learn youse.
That bill was subsequently 'parked' to give the now year-old Press Council time to prove itself effective at dealing with media complaints. Last week, another Ahern – Dermot – announced that he is going to introduce the legislation. Why? Because "there seems to be a growing disregard for the privacy of the individual". Note the word "seems". According to who? Who has been calling for a privacy law? Was it Dermot Ahern himself?
Ahern knows the value of privacy. For example, the equality minister now knows it's better to keep his views on homosexuals private. Back in 1993 he agreed with Fine Gael's Brendan McGahon that gays were deviants. Once the press highlighted this, he was branded homophobic.
His dealings with the family of terror chief Michael McKevitt might have been kept private if the press hadn't reported that he forwarded an email on his behalf to Michael McDowell. The press hasn't done Ahern any favours. Could this be personal?
The new law forbids "surveillance", "stalking/harassment" and "disclosure of documentation" – all legitimate weapons in the journalist's armoury. Documents that can't be published will include publicly available material from, among others, county council planning files and the Land Registry Office. Without the disclosure of such documents, the extent of planning corruption in north Dublin may never have come to light.
Without "stalking", the documentary that led to the beef tribunal might not have been made. In that programme, journalist Susan O'Keeffe approaches beef baron Larry Goodman for a comment as he is leaving mass and pursues him until he drives off. Under the new rules, Goodman could have got an injunction and halted production. Similarily, Brendan O'Brien's legendary "stalking" of Martin 'The General' Cahill might not have been aired. The print labours of Veronica Guerin would have been hampered too.
With the new restrictions, Seanie Fitz might be able to get an injunction against a newspaper revealing that he's enjoying a nice holiday in Spain.
The new law states that invasions of privacy are justified when they're in good faith, the public interest and fair. Sounds reasonable? It isn't. It's 'Catch 22': for an invasion of privacy to be justified, you must invade someone's privacy to prove it. However, you can't invade someone's privacy because that's not justified without proof. A reporter who is stymied by an injunction can be found to have broken the rules just because he was unable to finish his investigation.
So, again, who has asked for this privacy law? Take a guess. Last year, Dublin City University released a study which revealed that two-thirds of all privacy complaints over the past 25 years had come from public figures, chiefly politicians.
The hypocrisy at the heart of this law is staggering. In February, minister Ahern was forced to introduce new European legislation requiring telephone operators to store details of all calls made for two years. Under Irish law, they had to store them for three years. All your calls, emails and internet usage are logged by the government. How about a privacy law against that?
Ahern's announcement last week was all the more telling because of its timing. It came just weeks after this newspaper broke the Brian Cowen portraits story. This was a clear threat to the press. It was a slap on the wrist for getting uppity and a direct attack on the fundamental right to freedom of information.
We don't need this law. The press ombudsman is doing a good job of correcting rogue journalism. It's independent, fast and binding. As it's free, the public aren't put off complaining by legal costs. That's good for democracy, unlike privacy laws and VAT on newspapers.
This brings us back to Bertie, as it was his administration that dreamed up this nonsense. When I read the April Fool's portrait gag about him last week, it struck me that the words 'Ahern' and 'gag' were entirely appropriate given the decision to silence the press.
Forget about Cowen: Bertie deserves to be hung in the National Gallery.
I'll start building the scaffold…
dave@davekenny.com
Picture this: Bertie Ahern picks up the Sunday Tribune, sees a portrait of himself in the nude on page one and immediately despatches his art dealer with a brown envelope to buy it. Bertie doesn't want an unflattering picture of himself in the public domain. The only aras he wants the public to connect him with is the one in the Park.
Plausible? Highly. True? Unfortunately not. The preceding scenario formed a newspaper's April Fool's gag last week and I'm not ashamed to admit that I fell for it. That's the thing about Bertie – you wouldn't put anything past him. For a man who loves the limelight, he's fiercely protective of his privacy. He doesn't like the papers showing him up. That is probably why, under his stewardship, the VAT on newspapers rose to 13.5% – the highest in Europe (Britain has zero VAT). It probably also explains why his administration published a Privacy Bill in 2006 to curb the power of the press. Naughty press, Fianna Fáil will learn youse.
That bill was subsequently 'parked' to give the now year-old Press Council time to prove itself effective at dealing with media complaints. Last week, another Ahern – Dermot – announced that he is going to introduce the legislation. Why? Because "there seems to be a growing disregard for the privacy of the individual". Note the word "seems". According to who? Who has been calling for a privacy law? Was it Dermot Ahern himself?
Ahern knows the value of privacy. For example, the equality minister now knows it's better to keep his views on homosexuals private. Back in 1993 he agreed with Fine Gael's Brendan McGahon that gays were deviants. Once the press highlighted this, he was branded homophobic.
His dealings with the family of terror chief Michael McKevitt might have been kept private if the press hadn't reported that he forwarded an email on his behalf to Michael McDowell. The press hasn't done Ahern any favours. Could this be personal?
The new law forbids "surveillance", "stalking/harassment" and "disclosure of documentation" – all legitimate weapons in the journalist's armoury. Documents that can't be published will include publicly available material from, among others, county council planning files and the Land Registry Office. Without the disclosure of such documents, the extent of planning corruption in north Dublin may never have come to light.
Without "stalking", the documentary that led to the beef tribunal might not have been made. In that programme, journalist Susan O'Keeffe approaches beef baron Larry Goodman for a comment as he is leaving mass and pursues him until he drives off. Under the new rules, Goodman could have got an injunction and halted production. Similarily, Brendan O'Brien's legendary "stalking" of Martin 'The General' Cahill might not have been aired. The print labours of Veronica Guerin would have been hampered too.
With the new restrictions, Seanie Fitz might be able to get an injunction against a newspaper revealing that he's enjoying a nice holiday in Spain.
The new law states that invasions of privacy are justified when they're in good faith, the public interest and fair. Sounds reasonable? It isn't. It's 'Catch 22': for an invasion of privacy to be justified, you must invade someone's privacy to prove it. However, you can't invade someone's privacy because that's not justified without proof. A reporter who is stymied by an injunction can be found to have broken the rules just because he was unable to finish his investigation.
So, again, who has asked for this privacy law? Take a guess. Last year, Dublin City University released a study which revealed that two-thirds of all privacy complaints over the past 25 years had come from public figures, chiefly politicians.
The hypocrisy at the heart of this law is staggering. In February, minister Ahern was forced to introduce new European legislation requiring telephone operators to store details of all calls made for two years. Under Irish law, they had to store them for three years. All your calls, emails and internet usage are logged by the government. How about a privacy law against that?
Ahern's announcement last week was all the more telling because of its timing. It came just weeks after this newspaper broke the Brian Cowen portraits story. This was a clear threat to the press. It was a slap on the wrist for getting uppity and a direct attack on the fundamental right to freedom of information.
We don't need this law. The press ombudsman is doing a good job of correcting rogue journalism. It's independent, fast and binding. As it's free, the public aren't put off complaining by legal costs. That's good for democracy, unlike privacy laws and VAT on newspapers.
This brings us back to Bertie, as it was his administration that dreamed up this nonsense. When I read the April Fool's portrait gag about him last week, it struck me that the words 'Ahern' and 'gag' were entirely appropriate given the decision to silence the press.
Forget about Cowen: Bertie deserves to be hung in the National Gallery.
I'll start building the scaffold…
dave@davekenny.com
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